


Take the Fun Way Home

by xYoSa



Category: Iron Man (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Incredible Hulk (2008)
Genre: Car Sex, Fluff and Smut, Frotting, Hand Jobs, Humor, M/M, Making Out, Minor Car Accident, Mutual Masturbation, Ripped Clothing, Smut, Winter driving, conserving body heat, not really but that’s their story and they’re sticking to it, snowstorm
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-31
Updated: 2021-01-31
Packaged: 2021-03-17 10:20:58
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,841
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29098707
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/xYoSa/pseuds/xYoSa
Summary: Tony and Bruce skid off the road in a snowstorm on their way home from Bruce’s birthday party. Despite not being in any real danger, within five minutes they’re “conserving body heat” in the best possible way.
Relationships: Bruce Banner/Tony Stark
Comments: 12
Kudos: 57





	Take the Fun Way Home

**Author's Note:**

  * For [dr_zofia_bites](https://archiveofourown.org/users/dr_zofia_bites/gifts).



> For Misty, who, a few weeks ago in the weekly challenge channel of our server, posted the prompt “warmth” and it got me thinking about this. It’s a little late to post this in response to that prompt, but here it is anyway! Enjoy! <3

“This was a mistake,” murmured Bruce, looking out the car window at the giant snowflakes whizzing toward them in the bright beams of the headlights.

“I think you mean, ‘this was genius,’” answered Tony, who was driving. “We’re only forty-five minutes from the compound. And we’re avoiding all the Friday traffic on the main road. It’s the last Friday before Christmas, you know. It’s a zoo out there.”

“But we’re also going about ten miles an hour,” countered Bruce. “I don’t think they even plow this road. Can you actually see where you’re going?” 

“Of course. Everything is under control.”

The snowstorm outside was bad, but Tony knew he was a good enough driver not to be worried. Slow and steady, that’s all he needed to do.

“Famous last words,” muttered Bruce.

“Bah. Live a little,” Tony teased.

Bruce let out a little laugh at that, but didn’t respond. They were silent for a short while after that.

Then out of nowhere, Bruce suddenly asked, “Do you think I’m old?”

Tony scoffed and said truthfully, “Hell no, Bruciebear. Why would you think that?”

“Well, it is my birthday,” Bruce began. “I guess it’s just been on my mind lately.”

“Well, with a cake like the one Thor gave you tonight, how could it not be? I _told_ him not to put on one candle per year. That always looks worse than it is, even if you’re only like, twenty-two.”

“True,” Bruce replied with a short laugh. 

“Besides,” Tony continued. “You’re only a year older than me. So if you’re old, that means I’m old. And I am _definitely_ not old.” He frowned before adding, “Am I?”

Bruce chuckled and covered Tony’s hand on the gearshift with his own, giving it a little squeeze. “Definitely not. Deer.”

Tony huffed a laugh. “Okay but if you keep calling me names like _‘Dear,’_ we’re both going to be feeling old.”

“No, deer. Deer!” shouted Bruce.

“Oh, shit!”

Tony slammed on the brakes to avoid the animal, which had appeared so suddenly in the middle of the road that he could swear it had just materialized there. He knew enough about winter driving to steer into the skid, but it didn’t matter. The snow on this back road was about six inches deep, and there was no salvaging things; almost as if in slow motion, the car drifted to the right toward the ditch, slid down to the bottom of it, and came to rest just before a telephone pole.

The damned deer just gave them a smug-ass look before bounding off in the opposite direction.

“Are you okay?” Tony asked Bruce, though he was pretty sure he knew the answer. Their accident had been pretty gentle, all things considered.

Bruce nodded. “Yeah. You?”

“Yeah,” said Tony, before muttering, “Fuck. I can’t believe that happened.”

“I can,” said Bruce, lips twitching as if trying to avoid smirking.

“You jinxed me!” Tony protested. “With your ‘famous last words’ crap.”

“ _You_ had everything under control,” said Bruce, but there was no heat behind it. He pulled out his Starkphone and looked at the screen. “No signal.”

Tony grabbed his own phone to check, and sure enough, there were no bars showing. He looked out the window. The ditch wasn't particularly deep, but the slope up to the road was definitely too steep for Tony to even attempt to drive out.

“Well,” he said, “I think I managed to convince Barton to take this shortcut before we left the party. He and Natasha will probably be along shortly. They’ll see us.”

“Right, ‘ _shortcut_ ,’” teased Bruce. “Besides, Clint laughed at you when you suggested this route. I’m pretty sure they took the highway.”

“Time will tell,” replied Tony, who wasn’t worried. He knew they weren’t in any real danger. If Clint and Nat didn’t come along soon, he could summon a suit from the compound. But it had been a long time since he’d had to do that, and he wasn’t even sure that the repeaters still embedded in his forearms could do the trick.

“How did you even see that deer before me?” he asked suddenly, unable to put aside his pride just yet. “I didn’t look away from the window for a second.”

Another smile threatened to tug at Bruce’s lips. “You know how in certain situations, I can summon some extra strength from the Other Guy if I need to?”

“Yeah…” Tony began, before it clicked. “Oh—does the Big Guy have enhanced eyesight, too?”

Bruce nodded. “Enhanced strength, eyesight, smell and touch. In certain situations, I can ask him to loan me a little ‘enhancement’ without a transformation.” He inclined his head toward the windshield, a playful glint in his eye. “Y’know, like if I’m afraid for my safety driving in a snowstorm and want to see farther down the road.” 

Tony opened his mouth in mock offense. “Are you saying you didn’t feel safe driving with me?”

Bruce didn’t reply, he just looked around at their predicament as if the answer was obvious while suppressing yet another smile.

“Alright, alright, fair point, Nightcrawler,” Tony muttered, and Bruce let the grin play across his lips for real this time.

Fuck, those were some kissable lips.

His eyes flicked down Bruce’s body and back up again. He kinda wanted to get Bruce home, so that sexy smile would be the only thing he was wearing.

But just as he was about to suggest he summon a suit to push the car back to the road rather than wait for Clint and Nat, Bruce hugged his arms to himself and let a gratuitous shiver ripple through him. “It’s pretty chilly.”

That was an odd thing to say. Because it wasn’t chilly, not by a long shot. They had only just stopped a moment ago; their seat warmers hadn’t even started to cool down yet.

Bruce looked at Tony and Tony looked back. Their eyes met, and somehow it just clicked, as they read each other’s minds at the same time.

Oh.

Oh _hell_ yes.

But Tony was a bastard, and he decided to drag things out for another minute.

“Mm,” he hummed. “I think I’ve got some extra mittens in the glove box.”

“Mm,” echoed Bruce, playing along. “They’d have to be pretty thick gloves to warm me up. I’m completely frozen.” He emphasized this by cupping his hands to his mouth and breathing into them.

“Oh, never mind then,” said Tony with a wave of his hand. “They’re not that good. You’ll probably need something a lot warmer than that.”

“…Yeah.”

“…Yeah.”

There was a beat of silence and then, as if on cue, they both leaned toward each other at the same time and their lips met in a very needy kiss. Bruce didn’t mess around; his hand reached immediately for Tony’s crotch and he palmed his dick through his dress pants, drawing an obscene groan from Tony’s throat as he opened his legs wider as an invitation to Bruce.

They pulled away from the kiss for just a moment while they each worked furiously to undo each other’s ties and shirts. Tony unbuttoned Bruce’s shirt easily, but Bruce got a little frustrated with Tony’s smaller and more numerous buttons and ended up just ripping open his shirt. Tony probably should have been pissed, but it was way too sexy for him to care.

Then they were back to kissing again, Tony leaning over far to reach Bruce’s lips. He shifted to reach him better and accidentally hit the car’s horn, making them both jump.

“Fuck,” Tony said. He pulled back a second to consider his options, as he and Bruce breathed heavily into the silence. The Audi was spacious for its size but it was still a bit cramped for two grown men about to go at it like a couple of teenagers after prom.

“Right,” he said, realizing what he wanted to do.

Bruce made a noise of pleasant surprise as Tony moved to the passenger side of the car to straddle him. Then Tony reached down beside the seat to press two of the buttons there, one to make Bruce’s seat slide backward and the other to recline the seatback. It did so at a snail’s pace, and Tony cursed while suppressing a laugh at the borderline awkwardness of it.

“These fancy cars don’t lend themselves very well to spontaneity, do they?” Bruce observed, laughing a little himself. “My first car was a Corsica. Manual everything. We’d already be naked by now in that car.”

“We’d be dead in that car,” said Tony with a giggle. “The brakes and steering are crap, we’d never get through a snowstorm like this in one of those.”

Bruce looked around them with a quirk of his eyebrow as if to say, ‘Well we didn’t get through the snowstorm in this car either, now did we?’

“Shut up,” said Tony, even though Bruce hadn’t actually spoken.

Finally the seat was slid back as far as it would go, which gave Tony enough room to reach for Bruce’s fly and undo it, which is exactly what he did. 

“God, you’re hot,” he said, pulling Bruce’s fancy white shirt open wider and splaying his hands on the hair of his chest before leaning back in for another kiss, which Bruce returned eagerly. “But I don’t think we can get totally undressed here,” he added. “I’m a little too old for those kinds of gymnastics.”

“So you’re just getting me riled up then?” Bruce asked, raising an eyebrow. “Is this because I insulted your fancy car? Two can play the riling up game, you know.” He emphasized that last remark with an upward nudge of his hips, which pushed his erection right against Tony’s ass. Tony hissed in pleasure and Bruce looked smugly satisfied.

“Surely you know who you’re talking to, Bruciebear,” said Tony. “I wouldn’t dream of getting you riled up without following through. Lift up,” he added with a tap to Bruce’s hip. Bruce did, allowing Tony to slide his pants and boxers down his hips a little, exposing his beautiful cock. Just the sight of it brought Tony to full hardness in his own pants. There was something about them being stranded in a car that just made this way hotter than it had any right to be.

Bruce grabbed Tony’s ass in both hands and squeezed, and Tony leaned forward and huffed a breath against Bruce’s lips, biting back the little embarrassing whine that he was definitely too old to be emitting. But when Bruce brought one hand back to the front of Tony’s hips and stroked his thumb firmly up and down Tony’s cock which was pressing tightly against the fabric of his pants, nothing could stop the plaintive moan that forced its way from his throat. Goddamn, Bruce knew how to push Tony’s buttons.

Well, Tony knew how to push Bruce’s too. He wrapped his hand firmly around Bruce’s rock-hard cock and was rewarded with a sexy little gasp.

“Fuck,” Tony breathed. “I want you.”

He played his hand along Bruce's shaft in a way that had Bruce scrabbling with his fingers to undo Tony’s fly. His fingers got flustered again like they did when he was opening Tony’s shirt, but unlike finely-sewn buttons, a belt and zippered fly weren’t quite as easy to rip open. Tony batted his hands away to do it himself, while Bruce gave an adorable little embarrassed smile that just made Tony’s heart burst.

Nothing turned Tony on more or made his heart fuller than seeing faint little cracks in Bruce’s fortress of control and knowing that he was responsible for it. Bringing him to a point where something as basic as undoing a pair of pants became a difficult task was as rare as water in a desert. So when it did happen, Tony drank it in greedily.

Tony undid his belt and fly, and before he could do more, Bruce batted _his_ hands away and reached in to pull out his dick, which was already aching and starting to drip. They were both breathing so heavily now that the windows were completely fogged up. The snowstorm was starting to let up, but there was nothing to see outside, aside from a long stretch of snowy road with an empty field on each side. But even if there had been, Tony only had eyes for Bruce right now.

He leaned forward to kiss the fuck out of Bruce again, Bruce’s mouth opening eagerly to welcome him in. It truly took Tony’s breath away, kissing Bruce. As he leaned all the way forward, his dick pressing up against Bruce’s, he couldn’t think of anything else in the world but having his sexy, sexy boyfriend out here in the middle of nowhere, where it felt like they were the only two people on earth. 

He leaned in closer to kiss a trail from Bruce’s mouth to his earlobe, nipping it gently just how Bruce liked. But Bruce suddenly pulled away, panting, his face drawn into a slight frown. Shit. Maybe he wasn’t as into this as Tony thought.

“What is it? You okay?” he breathed, already mentally preparing to put a premature end to the fun.

“Yeah, yeah,” Bruce assured him. “It’s just—your zipper—” They both looked down, and only then did Tony realize that the bottom of his fly was rubbing on Bruce’s exposed skin. That definitely could not be comfortable. Shit. There was no way Tony could lower his pants further while straddling Bruce. Would he have to get undressed after all? 

But Bruce continued: “I’m gonna just—” And before Tony knew what was happening, Bruce reached down and took hold of each side of Tony’s fly and pulled, easily splitting it open for several inches below the zipper.

Tony looked back at him in surprise and when he caught his eye, they both let out a burst of laughter, as Tony took Bruce’s face in his hands and leaned forward to kiss him again.

“Have I mentioned how sexy it is that you can just ask the Big Guy to lend you some super strength anytime you want?”

“Not anytime I want,” Bruce corrected. “He has to want it too.”

“Mmm,” Tony hummed, quirking an eyebrow seductively. “So he’s into this too, is he? It’s kind of a three-way we’ve got going here, huh?”

“Pretty much,” Bruce agreed with a grin. “Now where were we?” He gave Tony’s back a couple of impatient taps.

“I’m freezing is where we are,” Tony said dramatically, gesturing to his bare chest.

Without further delay, Tony leaned down again, covering Bruce’s mouth with his own and wrapping a hand around both his and Bruce’s cocks, which were pressed together again. Bruce cupped Tony’s face in his hands and moaned gratuitously against his lips, which just made Tony harder.

“Christ, Bruce,” Tony whispered. “You’re so fucking hot.”

Bruce opened his mouth to answer, but whatever he was going to say was lost as his eyes fluttered closed and a little gasp escaped his lips when Tony’s hand began to glide up and down their shafts. 

He truly was fucking hot, lying under Tony loving every second of what he was doing to him. Tony sat up a little to get a better look at Bruce’s gorgeous face. The storm was letting up even more now, opening a few breaks in the clouds to reveal the moon, which bathed the car in its glow. The moonlight shone on the passenger window and diffused in the fog there, casting a bright light onto Bruce’s face, bright enough for Tony to see every flicker of his eyelids, tremor of his jaw, and twitch of his full lips as he surrendered to the sensations Tony was giving him.

His hands on Tony’s face slackened and eventually fell limply to his sides as Tony sped up the motion of his hand, bringing both of them to the brink.

“Jesus, Tony, I—” Bruce’s words were cut off by a hitch in his throat as his breathing sped up and he came closer to climax. Tony let his face fall forward so their foreheads were touching. With each breath that heaved through Bruce’s chest, Tony pressed a kiss to his lips.

And Tony was close too, so _fucking_ close, but he wanted to wait, wanted to watch Bruce tumble over the precipice first.

“I wanna…wanna see you come,” he panted, lifting his head but only slightly, not wanting to separate too far from Bruce but wanting to get a clear look at his beautiful face. He adjusted the speed and pressure of his hand to work Bruce ever closer, knowing just how he liked it, how fast and how firm, and he reveled in the look on Bruce’s face, that rare look he got as he released the last vestiges of control and finally let himself go.

Bruce’s hands wrapped around Tony’s thighs and squeezed, spasming with each gasp, each twitch of his hips, and Tony sat all the way up to watch Bruce’s entire body as he came apart under him.

“Tony, fuck. Fuck. You…you are _so fucking_ —I, I’m gonna—”

“Yes, Bruce, fuck _, yes,”_ panted Tony.

Bruce let out a long moan that was amplified in the small space in the car, and then he was spilling over Tony’s hand and onto his own stomach as his whole body trembled and shook and he dug his fingers deeper into the flesh of Tony’s thighs, bruising them, and Tony knew he’d be relishing those bruises in the days to come.

Tony didn’t slow down, kept up the same speed of his hand, drawing out every drop of Bruce’s orgasm.

With the last throes of his climax, Bruce tipped his head back into the headrest, exposing his beautiful throat, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed hard, and his groan tapering out, ending with a gasped whisper of Tony’s name, and that was it for Tony.

He let go of Bruce’s dick so as not to overstimulate him, and continued jerking himself for only a few more strokes before he tumbled over the edge himself. With a loud groan of his own, the wave crashed over him, and he spilled onto Bruce’s stomach too, the strength of his orgasm making his hand falter. But then Bruce’s hand was there, wrapping firmly around Tony’s and guiding it up and down, sending more and more pulses through his body until his legs were shaking, and he let out the barest whimper as Bruce finally released him.

They didn’t say anything for a few moments. Tony just stayed straddled on him as they looked into each other’s eyes, panting, speechless.

Well. If _that_ wasn’t just the hottest fucking thing they’d ever done.

“Holy, fucking, Christ, Tony,” Bruce said, looking completely sated with a lazy, dazed grin on his face. “I thought I was too old for shit like this.”

Tony gave him a wicked grin in return. “Told you you weren’t old, Bruciebear. And I knew you knew it deep down, too. I mean, this whole thing was your idea. ‘It’s pretty chilly,’ you were saying?”

To Tony’s surprise, Bruce blushed a little. “I didn’t think you’d go for it _here,_ to be honest. I was trying to hint that I wanted you, yeah, but I just thought it would motivate you to get us home faster so we could have our fun there. I thought you’d summon a suit to push the car out.”

You—seriously?” Tony said with a laugh. “You should know by now that you can’t hint at sex to me in the middle of nowhere and then expect me to wait until we get _home_ to do anything about it.”

“I know now,” Bruce replied with a mischievous smile. “And now that I know, I plan to use it.”

“Use it against me?”

“Definitely,” Bruce said with a loving grin, reaching his hand behind Tony’s neck and pulling him in for a long kiss.

Suddenly a glimmer of light caught Tony’s eye. He pulled away from Bruce and looked up at the rear window of the car. It was still fogged up, but he could tell that a bright light was shining in the distance, slowly getting closer.

Clint and Nat.

“Shit,” Tony whispered with a frantic laugh, looking down at himself and Bruce, their dicks still out, Tony’s hand and Bruce’s stomach sticky with come. “That son of a bitch did decide to take this shortcut.”

“Oh fuck,” said Bruce, looking like a guilty teenager as he stifled a laugh of his own, and then the two of them frantically began returning things to normal. Tony grabbed some tissues from the pack he kept in the center console and quickly wiped down himself and Bruce, then he crawled off him and back to the driver’s seat.

The car was closing in on their location, the light nearly filling the rearview mirror when Tony looked at it. Tony heard the engine start to slow down.

Bruce quickly zipped up his fly and rebuttoned his shirt. Tony buttoned his pants and fastened his belt, but there was no salvaging his fly, not when it was ripped all the way down below his crotch. Not to mention his shirt buttons which were mostly torn off.

The car came to a stop on the road beside the ditch and the passenger side door opened. Shit.

Tony reached into the back seat where his and Bruce’s winter coats were stowed for the long drive home, and grabbed the one on top. It was Bruce’s, but there was no time. Clint was steps away from his door. He threw the coat over his upper body like a blanket.

Clint arrived and knocked on the window. Tony rolled it down and a gust of cold air and snowflakes rushed in.

“Hey, you guys okay?”

“Yep! Yeah,” Tony replied, a little too jovially. “Just had a little incident with an asshole deer. Nobody was hurt. Not even the deer, sadly.”

“‘Sadly’ is right,” Clint answered. “They make for good eating.”

Before Tony could even think of a response to that, Clint continued. “Were you waiting for us to come along? I’m not sure how much help we can be. We took Nat’s car to the party, and there are no towing cables on it.” He leaned down further to look at Bruce, and Tony held his breath, certain that he was about to deduce what they'd been up to. But instead, he just said to Bruce, “You’re probably better off asking Hulk for a favor and getting him to come out and push the car out.”

“And ruin his beautiful dress clothes?” asked Tony scandalously. “No, I’ve got a suit coming.” He suddenly remembered that he had not in fact summoned a suit yet. He flicked his wrists as discreetly as possible to get that ball rolling, and prayed it would work like it used to.

But stupid Clint couldn’t leave things alone. “Shouldn’t it be here by now?” he asked. “How long have you guys been stuck here…” His voice trailed off as he leaned closer and those damned hawk eyes of his took note of the situation inside the car. Bunch of crumpled tissues in the cup holder. Tony and Bruce’s hair messed up. Bruce’s jacket covering Tony, but not all the way. The top had slipped down when Tony flicked his wrists, revealing the top few ripped buttons of his open shirt. He quickly pulled it up when he noticed, but did so too quickly and pulled it up too far, revealing his torn pants, with his blue silk boxers clearly visible under the tear.

Clint’s face morphed from curious to completely scandalized as he understood. “Oh my _god,_ you guys. You didn’t!”

Bruce shifted uncomfortably in his seat, and Tony spared a glance at him. He was looking away from them out his window, but even at that angle, in the near-darkness, Tony could see how bright red his ears were.

“Don’t worry, babe,” he tried to soothe, “Barton’s just jealous.”

“Everything okay?” called Nat, who had emerged from her car and was heading toward them. _Great._ Tony heard a faint groan from Bruce’s side of the car.

“Oh, they’re okay,” answered Clint with a laugh as she approached. “More than okay, actually.” He turned back to Tony. “Did you even call a suit, or were you too busy acting like a couple of teenagers finding your thrill on Blueberry Hill?”

Tony raised his eyebrows and said haughtily, “Of course I called a suit. Just as you arrived here.”

Clint scoffed. 

“It’ll only take like forty seconds to get here at this distance,” Tony added.

Sure enough, just as he finished the sentence, he looked out the windshield and saw a light in the distance, growing closer until four lights were discernible. Just before the suit reached the ground, the propulsion emitting from its hands and feet cut out, and it made a graceful landing beside Tony’s car. Tony pulled out his phone to take command of the suit’s finer motor controls.

“You have an _app_ for your suit?” asked Clint, hugging his arms to himself and looking at Tony like he’d just grown a second head.

Tony gave him an equally incredulous look back. “Well I don’t have my headset with me, do I? The app is for emergencies.”

“There’s no signal out here, I checked,” countered Clint.

Tony just smiled, unlocking his phone. “Bluetooth,” he said simply.

Clint opened his mouth as if to give a snarky reply, but instead he just closed it and shook his head. Then he leaned in to whisper something to Nat, who gasped and laughed. Tony only needed one guess at what he was telling her.

Damned Barton.

As it turned out, the Bluetooth functionality on the suit wasn’t all it was cracked up to be.

Tony swiped on his phone to make the suit walk behind the car, but it didn’t budge. “What the…” He swiped again, more forcefully this time, and the suit moved, but instead of walking behind the car, it just sat down beside Clint in the snow.

Clint burst out laughing, and Nat punched his arm. 

“Just get in our car, we’ll drive you home,” Clint said.

“And leave my baby out here all night in the ditch? No way.”

“It’s not going anywhere,” argued Nat. “No one’s going to come down this road.”

“We did,” pointed out Clint.

“Well, we’re idiots,” Nat said.

“We’re not leaving the car,” said Tony irritably, getting out of the car, not caring how visible his ripped pants were, even though Nat clearly noticed and wasn’t even trying to suppress her grin. He put on Bruce’s coat and zipped it up. “The Bluetooth chip is probably just loose. I just have to tighten it.”

He crouched down in front of the suit and paused as the realization hit him. “Shit,” he muttered.

“What is it?” asked Nat.

Of course the fucking Bluetooth chip was deep inside the left shoulder piece where only specialized tools would reach it.

“You wouldn’t happen to have a screwdriver set in your car, would you? With very _small_ screwdrivers?”

Nat shook her head. “Only a car jack and a ratchet set.”

“I’ve got a pocket knife!” shouted Clint. He knelt down beside Tony and handed it to him. Tony tried to use it to loosen the tiny screws on the shoulder plate of the suit, but they didn’t budge. It didn’t help that his hands were freezing.

“Here, let me try,” said Clint, snatching the knife from Tony to try.

Tony snatched it back and snapped at him, “I almost had it!”

“No you didn’t!” shouted Clint. “You gotta hold it at an angle. Here, let me show you.”

“You’re gonna strip the screws!—”

Their argument was suddenly interrupted by a loud, impatient growl. Tony looked up to see a big green figure walking around from the passenger side of the car, looking thoroughly irritated.

“Hulk!” shouted Tony, both happy and relieved to see him, despite how annoyed the other guy seemed at the moment. “Happy birthday, Big Guy!”

“Hnh,” grunted Hulk, positioning himself behind the car to push it out of the ditch. “Robot broken. Unreliable. Puny Banner is cold, wants to go home. Hulk wants something done right? Has to do it himself.”

He gave a disappointed shake of his head and gently grasped the car’s bumper, easily pushing it out of the ditch and back onto the road. As he passed Tony and the others, he said to Tony, “Next time, Hulk fucks Tony, puny Banner pushes car.”

Tony grinned devilishly. “Oh don’t you worry, Big Guy, we won’t be waiting for a snowstorm on a country road before the next time you fuck me.” Hulk let out a hearty laugh at that, and Tony joined in.

Clint threw his hands in the air in defeat.

“Great, _three_ teenagers!”

**Author's Note:**

> The brakes on Corsicas truly are crap 😆


End file.
